..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
