My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
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