Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Randomize
