so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize