it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
