hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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