You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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