Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize