so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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