don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
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