Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
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For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
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I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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