oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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