Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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