my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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