Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Randomize
