Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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