with your own penis?
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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