i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
