Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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