It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
