i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize