So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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