therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
