I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Randomize
