I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
