Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
