the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize