I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
