I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
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