so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
