I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
