How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Randomize
