Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
