How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
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he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
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I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial