did you get engaged???
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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