Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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