these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
