I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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