Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
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