i just google imaged poop.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Randomize
