Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(913): View more from Kansas

You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.

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(913): You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion. http://tfl.nu/50jg

Replies (86) Good night (3324) Bad night (654)
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(209): View more from California

Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?

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(209): Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese? http://tfl.nu/1zro

Replies (53) Good night (3457) Bad night (678)
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(770): View more from Georgia

Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.

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(770): Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable. http://tfl.nu/w2xg

Replies (16) Good night (2649) Bad night (1267)
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(734): View more from Michigan

wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton

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(734): wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton http://tfl.nu/f5q9

Replies (27) Good night (904) Bad night (4601)
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(763): View more from Minnesota

dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve

(608): View more from Wisconsin

clearly you are not from wisconsin

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(763): dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve (608): clearly you are not from wisconsin http://tfl.nu/j6wr

Replies (104) Good night (7711) Bad night (874)
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(209): View more from California

Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.

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(209): Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night. http://tfl.nu/9abu

Replies (27) Good night (5130) Bad night (1217)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again

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(412): I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again http://tfl.nu/0m8m

Replies (14) Good night (1028) Bad night (4556)
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(207): View more from Maine

Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........

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(207): Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010"......... http://tfl.nu/3k58

Replies (7) Good night (780) Bad night (2676)
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(813): View more from Florida

The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.

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(813): The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth. http://tfl.nu/4ea8

Replies (5) Good night (2022) Bad night (1239)
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(407): View more from Florida

Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.

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(407): Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people. http://tfl.nu/19v1

Replies (12) Good night (1791) Bad night (731)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again

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(402): I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again http://tfl.nu/3l87

Replies (0) Good night (766) Bad night (390)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.

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(337): plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock. http://tfl.nu/69tv

Replies (8) Good night (510) Bad night (1129)
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(315): View more from New York

Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack

(1-315): View more from New York

This is why I love you...

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(315): Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack (1-315): This is why I love you... http://tfl.nu/jq03

Replies (5) Good night (834) Bad night (203)
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(407): View more from Florida

Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation

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(407): Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation http://tfl.nu/aq4y

Replies (1) Good night (353) Bad night (241)
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(647): View more from Ontario

He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms

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(647): He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms http://tfl.nu/bn1m

Replies (1) Good night (668) Bad night (173)

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