my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize