I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
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i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
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It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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