Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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