so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
