As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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