YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
