Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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