im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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