I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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