his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize