how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
